I just saw a guy wearing a neon pink tracksuit attempting some sort of stretchy yoga moves in the park today. Honestly, you’d think by his expressions he was being tortured, not stretching. I mean, 10 minutes after a run for stretching seems fair enough, right? But I don’t know, maybe his body didn’t get the memo.
Anyway, it got me thinking – after an intense run, which, let’s be honest, for me means a battle against my legs that basically go on strike after mile two, stretching should probably be the next logical move. Who doesn’t love scrolling through their Instagram for fitness tips, right? They say it helps you avoid walking around like someone who’s committed to wearing stilettos for the first time.
So there I was, watching this guy – let’s call him Neon Guy – absolutely giving his ‘everything’ into these stretches. His hamstrings were clearly protesting with every lunge. It’s like his forehead signed a lease for a permanent frown.
In all seriousness, feeling like a human pretzel should probably be less comfortable than it is. I’d skip it most days if not for the nightmare of DOMS (Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness, but really should be called, “I can’t sit down” syndrome). It’s not cute needing a crane to pick you up when you’ve collapsed into a chair.
I don’t know though, between deciding whether or not I’ll ever become one of those ‘dedicated runners’, I think I might just settle comfortably with short runs and some lazy stretches. But hey, at least I can pretend I’m getting fit, even if a hamster on its wheel might move faster than me at this point.
I need coffee. Everything hurts. Ugh.