So, what’s the obsession with cactus water? Seriously, people are acting like it’s the second coming of coconut water, which, by the way, wasn’t exactly the miracle some made it out to be either. Just because it’s got half the sugar doesn’t mean it’s some kind of mystical elixir. Oh wow, high electrolytes and antioxidants, how groundbreaking! I’m guessing next they’ll say it cures boredom and bad dates too.
And let’s not forget this so-called ‘ultimate hangover cure’ nonsense. Like, sure, drink cactus water and magically, you’re revitalized. What ever happened to a good old cup of coffee and an aspirin? Are we that pretentious now? And just because you slap an ‘anti-inflammatory’ label on it doesn’t mean we’re all going to start spritzing our faces with this stuff like it’s some Hollywood beauty secret. I’ve got free tap water that hydrates just fine, thanks.
Oh, and did I mention that it’s being marketed like it’s farmed straight from a moon orbiting Jupiter or something? Imagine walking into a store and seeing bottles of this stuff staring at you from the shelf, almost mocking you to buy into the hype. But hey, if you want to spend your money on glorified cactus juice while pretending it’s going to make your skin glow and turn you into a superhuman, go right ahead. Meanwhile, I’ll stick to my boring tap water. Whatever.